“How using sex toys helped me accept my body”
Stéphanie, 33, explains to us how doing good alone helped her love herself physically. An ultra-inspiring testimony which, a few days before Valentine's Day, gives ideas.
“I'm 33 and until I was 28, I didn't like my body. I always had something to reproach him for. Too much of this, not enough of that, stretch marks here, cellulite there.
Nothing original unfortunately, and reflections which surely had the gift, beyond undermining my morale, of annoying those around me because they spilled over into our conversations. No one has ever criticized me for being so hard on myself, because I am lucky to have a group of great and caring friends, only I knew that this constant self-criticism weighed on me. On my relationships with others on the one hand, but above all on my self-confidence.
In 2016, it hadn't been very long since a now very well-known sex toy had started to appear on the market. And it wasn't long before the use of the object in general was normalized. Well, in my own private circles, anyway. It was my friend Clara who told me she tried it first. She couldn't believe the sensation it gave her in her clitoris. It must be said that the guys she went out with didn't seem to want to dwell too much on her pleasure.
I don't remember exactly everything she said to me, but just one sentence: 'since I got this thing, I spend my life making love to myself'.”
“Confronting the complexes I imposed on myself”
"'Make love to me'. These words echoed in my head for a while. As if having desire for oneself, or in this case, for myself, was an idea that had never crossed my mind. My first reaction was a bit knee-jerk, a mix of internalized stigma against female masturbation and ignorance of how I should go about it. Classic. And then, little by little, I asked myself what it would be like if I, too, felt good like Clara.
Face-to-face with my figure, confronting the complexes that I imposed on myself and that I had suffered for ages. End up cherishing my body, caressing it, making it come. The idea became more and more convincing. One day, I decided to take the plunge and make what had turned into a fantasy a reality. I bought a 'clit sucker', as my friend jokingly called it, on a site which listed dozens of them and without really understanding what I was investing in.
The package arrived at my guardian's house on a Friday, I still remember it. And besides, I blush just thinking about the film I made before going to get it, so Frank, my guardian, would inevitably have guessed what was in it. I don't know what I was imagining - maybe the sex toy would have been sent in a huge package shaped like a dildo, who knows - but obviously he never found out. On the one hand because he really didn’t care, on the other because the cardboard couldn’t be more banal.”
“Should I keep my panties on?”
“That same evening, I unwrapped the small model I had given myself and placed it on my bed. I observed it a bit like a UFO; I didn't know where to start. Did I absolutely have to be naked? Keep my panties on? Add mood lighting? Lube? Wash it before use? Read the instructions? Go to bed, hide it in my underwear drawer and never talk about it again?
I remembered Clara's words. 'Make love to me'. I told myself that even if the experiment completely failed, it couldn't be negative. And I'll have something to tell the next time we see each other. So I slowly slid the sex toy over my vulva, looking for the perfect clitoral spot, the orgasmic effects she had praised to me.
After a few more or less successful attempts, I succeeded.
“A feeling of power”
After a few days, I wanted to start again. The more I allowed myself these privileged moments - once a week I would say - the more I saw my body from another angle. That of a ship that can give me crazy pleasure. No longer an enemy, but an ally. I felt a sense of power, too.
I was learning to accept what bothered me and focus on all the parts that pleased me. It wasn't immediate, but what is clear is that this change began at the same time as my discovery of all these accessories - of different brands and stimulation zones - which I can no longer do without. now (laughs) .
Five years later, I know every inch of my skin by heart and know exactly how to reach orgasm, whether I'm 'making love' or accompanied. And this self-confidence spills over into my romantic relationships, without hesitation. I even adopted another ritual, in addition to masturbation with a sex toy: that of taking a naked photo of myself.
Not to send them, but to keep them safe for myself. To remember how far I have come, to be proud of it, and to continue to find myself beautiful and powerful.
Because I am.”
To overcome your complexes and take your first steps with a sex toy, Ona our first clitoral stimulator is perfect for beginners . With its easy handling and soft touch, Ona is your best ally for (re)discovering your intimate pleasure. Ona is the embodiment of our holistic approach to well-being which involves fulfilled sexuality. ❤️
